Direct To Review: Beyond The Trek (Teleios) By Leonard Torres

A Scientific Study in Both Plot Holes and Human Robot Love

Space… the final frontier. While the crew of the Enterprise (in both Abrams-verse and original) were out discovering and boldly going, the crew of the Teleios were tasked with retrieving a special compound from another ship that was meant to save a dying Earth’s atmosphere.

When we meet our brave adventurers, who are genetically altered prefect humans called GC’s, they are just waking up from a stasis nap of about 3 years, don’t worry– after watching this film you feel like you joined them in their rest. Right off the bat I was impressed with the actors (which includes the awesome Sunny Mabrey sans snakes), but am completely thrown off by the constant and endless tilting and shifting of the camera angle. While I understand this was to emulate both the Abrams false movement from the first Star Trek reboot, and give us perceived motion, all it really did was create some dizzying moments. It is one thing to have a sense of constant movement and another to literally never stop twisting the camera. If you have very sensitive motion sickness I would avoid this movie at all cost or else you will be shouting KAHNNN from the bathroom.

After adjusting to the endless movement of the camera I was actually really engaged in the first plot the was given to us– yes, I said first. This movie was building up a story about a mysterious substance and how they will stop at nothing to recover it, even after finding the ship they were supposed to pick it up from was completely trashed. Once on the ship they find Lulu, an android, and O’Neil, the last surviving crew member who was crazy and listening to “Gwar”… for some reason. (Side note, they felt the need to point out the band and really let the music play out and I have no clue why. It never comes up again.) After some “convincing” and more mishaps this plot about the compound falls apart and melds into a psychological thriller about the GC’s and why these perfect humans all of a sudden feel emotion. They then leave that behind for the ending, which I won’t spoil, and never really come back to the compound after a weird stab at trying to get it to fit in there. Overall, there were three plots and only half a conclusion.

Plot holes and metal bands aside, the actors, set designers, and graphic artists really knocked it out of the park. When the plot and camera angles were steady you felt engaged and cared, though they were few and far inbetween. The crew for sure gets some Vulcan snaps for a job well done.

So is this a Star Trek film, or at least feels like one? Yes, but not in the good ways. Exposition was drawn out and made it feel like the actors had to give us a play by play to help us follow along. The crew was one dimensional and were barely introduced, so when things started happening you felt nothing for them. Lens flares were used in obsession and the constant rocking makes this movie hard to watch.

This movie was a bit boring and had no follow through, so for that reason I give this 3 Vulcan mind melds out of 5. But make your own conclusion when this ship launches from the starport on September 5th.

Late Gamer Plays: Far Cry 3 by Hidai Moya

Far Cry 3

After 55 hours of hunting exotic wildlife from Sumatran Tigers to Komodo dragons, gathering plants for making narcotic cocktails, battling African pirates, arms dealers, human traffickers, mercenaries, & drug lords, I finally beat FARCRY3. The story never compelled me but the games self awareness makes it fun as the hero revels in how much fun it is in just blowing shit up or lighting things on fire. This game definitely lives up to its title as being transported to this lawless third world tropical island overflowing with insanity is an eerie experience that’s as far removed from Western civilization as it’s possible to get. Felt like playing a pulpy 80’s action movie with a soundtrack & villains to match. Grade A-

Late Gamer Plays The Last of Us By Hidai Moya

This is the first game I’ve played where I cared more about the cut scenes than the actual gameplay itself. The zombie apocalypse setting is pretty standard stuff we’ve seen before but its the emotional story at the heart of this that makes it so special. Ellie is a fantastic character, voiced evocatively by Ashley Johnson, & I was astonished at how much of an emotional attachment you form with her as you play her father figure Joel. Being a teenager during the zombie apocalypse isn’t easy so its very rewarding when Ellie has moments of adolescent levity amidst the horror all around (I loved the scene with her & Joel as they drive in the pick up truck). The best part of the story is when Joel emotionally comforts Ellie at the end of her terrifying ordeal during the Winter chapter. The human emotions here are eerily real. Grade A

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